Coming Out of Hibernation

March 8, 2018

This may be the longest hiatus to date I’ve taken from sharing with you.  I wish I had some terrific announcement or news to update you with, but really it’s just been life.  You guys, I’m having trouble lately catching my breath.  I don’t like it.  Everything is whizzing by and I feel like I have hardly a second to interpret it, before it’s like three weeks later.  I hate talking about how busy I am, because newsflash, everyone is busy!  But my busyness feels hollow and lackluster.  I’m desperate for inspiration, for insight, for anything other than going all day and hardly being able to keep my eyes open at 8:02pm.  Who am I?  Where am I?

Since January, my last post (eeeeeek!), I can hardly come up with one legitimate thing to share with you.  The boys and I took off for Arizona for a week in mid-February to spend some time with my parents and the sunshine.  But that’s it.  Isn’t that terrible?  It’s like I have no idea how I’ve arrived on March 8th.  Part of it, I know, is just this season of life.  I’m needed A LOT.  Sometimes that’s endearing and affirming and other times it’s suffocating and straight-up annoying.  Finding balance between those sets of emotions can be tough.  In the midst of that, I’m constantly looking for inspiration and perspective.  It’s not always to be found or better yet, I’m too tired to articulate it! 

I know you guys get it, many of you are in it with me, some of you have been through it, but I appreciate the grace nonetheless. 

For now, I’ll leave you with a quick Elena update.  In the next few weeks, Chad and I will be meeting at school to revise her IEP (Individualized Education Plan) for FIRST GRADE.  I’m dying a little when I say that.  With two years of Kindy under her belt, she’s pretty much a pro!  Ha!  This year has been much better for her, not without it’s own set of challenges and struggles, but we’ve been much more confident in her time there.  You guys, she’s huge.  Her legs are like a mile long and her sweet, chubby baby face is growing into a bright-eyed, beautiful girl one.  All eight of her front teeth have been replaced with adult sized teeth, which is still insanely adorable, but gone are the days of her gap-toothed baby teeth.  She’s still as happy as can be, laughing when her brother’s get in trouble or start to cry, and squealing in delight when it’s loud and chaotic.  She still loves music, school, her therapists and being told she’s pretty.  We remain encouraged about all the possibilities for her future and all her achievements.  But, she still has her struggles.  Her little body can be so frustrating for her and for us, as we watch her light up with intent, then struggle to act.  We are still praying and believing in a solution for her to easily communicate with us.  Patience is a virtue in life and especially on this road we walk with her.  But, we continue to trust God and her team that we will be led to just the PERFECT device/routine/adaptation for her.

You guys, the best part is seeing every day how ridiculously, utterly, totally loved and adored this girl is.  Not just by us but by friends, family, classmates, teachers, therapists and anyone who sees her big hair bow, glittering blue eyes and toothy smile.  Just this week, two of her little friends at school painted her a picture and hand-made her a coloring book.  I emailed her teacher to ask if they were specifically for Elena and her reply was YES!  The girls in class simply adore her!  This confirms to me, that even though my precious girl is without words, everyone is drawn to the light that shines from her.  This makes me beam with pride and comforts my heart to know how loved and appreciated she is.  What a gift! 

Happy girl.

Being silly with one of Calvin’s Valentine surprises!

Standing tall with Miss Polly (her PT)

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This is Elena. Our Light. You can see all the goodness and joy that shines from those deep blue eyes. She loves sneezes, yawns, industrial toilet flushes, automatic paper towel dispensers and The Star Spangled Banner. Music is her everything, specifically Moana, Frozen (really all Disney), Queen & Taylor Swift. Nothing makes her squeal quite like swimming, fast boat rides and her two brothers in trouble. In addition to her megawatt smile, Elena reminds us to cherish the smallest of victories, to live in the present, and to daily dwell in a posture of gratitude for every breath and every blessing.  

More About Our Story

I’m Emmalee, an ordinary gal born and raised in the Heartland. Wife to Chad, and Mom to Elena, Calvin & Turner, I spend most my days ridin’ dirty (literally so much trash) in my minivan carting kids to and fro. When I’m not being a Momager, I excel at self-care, cooking gourmet meals my kids won’t eat and deep-diving all the feelings. Most days, my attitude is gratitude, just taking life one step at a time.

Emmalee & Elena

Meet The Gals